If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
