Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
