her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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