All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
