New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
