Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize