I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize