I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I think weed is turning my hair brown
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
