You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize