Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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