i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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