guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Randomize