his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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