I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize