I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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