I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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