And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
