What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize