i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
