My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
