I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I forgot how hot balto sounded
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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