yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
