Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
