uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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