paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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