But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Someone shattered a urinal.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
