YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
