You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
