There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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