I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
i believe in u and ur pee
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
