I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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