Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
