no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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