I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
