my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
