i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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