this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Sext me about skeletons
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I have tasted many bathrooms
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
