your thong is hanging out like whoa
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize