Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Congratulations! We have a period
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