I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
