Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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