He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
So much Jack, so little girl.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
