Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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