Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
