Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
