We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize