Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
