try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
