That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
