I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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