i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
