You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize